Prayer Request

Hi all.

school is going well. I just got back from yet another awesome trip to Vancouver. This one was just for two nights, which is obviously very disappointing. I always want it to be longer. But it was still AMAZING becuause my best friend flew in to visit her brother and sister in law (Twaan was the best man in their wedding) so it’s a super small world, and it was wonderful to see her.

it’s been hard coming back. I am struggling with things at my apartment. I’m also having a hard time with God/Christianity. I just feel like I am surrounded by hypocrites (myself included). It makes me want to drop this whole faith thing and move on. I’m not going to, obviously. I still love Abba and Jesus and I think that everything the Lord does is great. But I am still incredibly frustrated by the church, and all of the failures. We have lots of holy books on the shelves of my apartment and yet, I feel like none of it has impacted us.

it is driving me NUTS.

I’ve also had some roller coaster emotional days and am having a difficult time controlling my thought life. Basically, I’m exhausted and feel all over the place emotionally. I want even my internal thought life to bring glory to God, and lately, I’m pretty sure it’s falling quite short of that.

on the sunny side of the street, Twaan and one of his roommates and I have decided to get together on a regular basis and talk about spiritual stuff. We are also going to attend Prayer and Communion every Friday monring together. I’m really excited for this. I already felt better tonight after hanging out with them once. See? It’s amazing the things that God can do in one evening. Glory be.

 

The lights of ballard, fremont and wallingford

are all outside my window.

I haven’t much to say. Portland was fun. We stayed with Caleb and Kat and helped them pack up. And then we moved them in to Jared and Teresa’s. These are the kinds of people that I love. Jared and Teresa have taken Kat and Caleb in for a few months. Then, Josh and Jonathon are in between leases so they have moved in for 10 days. Jana is coming to visit in a couple weeks, and of course, Twaan and I will be back down for that.

All the while Teresa makes chocolate dipped strawberries in the kitchen and delicious chocolate chip scones. I even get scolded for doing dishes.

This is generosity. And hospitality.

Classes started up a couple days ago. It’s been okay. I like them all, it’s just a really random mix. My Marxism class is a strange group of philosophy, sociology, psych, sociology, latin american studies, business, and, oh yeah, the token polisci majors. Like me. What? How did that happen?

Tonight I had an “intense dark mocha” with a shot of hazelnut. Twaan brought it to me, after I called him. I was having a bad night, and my wonderful pacar came all the way down the hill to me. He took me to the canal, gave me delicious coffee from Tully’s and sat with me as we watched a tug boat push a barge down through the black water.

Now it is late. Nick just left, after a nearly completed crossword. I’m listening to Celtic music, and the sound of Kelsie texting. And I can see all of ballard, the canal, fremont, and wallingford from our windows. Today is a better day. Or a better night, after a rollercoaster day.

Thanks to Jesus.

Thanks to Twaan.

(And thanks to Will, and his delicious mochas…)

 

You Know? I kind of like the exercise-ball-as-chair-phenomenon

It’s true. It’s starting to grow on me. Not to mention all these nifty exercises that Kelsie taught me. Which is handy, because my normal situps just weren’t hurting enough recently. But these moves on the exercise ball, well, they really help me satiate my masochistic tendencies. Ha.

Anyway. Nothing to say, I’m just really trying to make good on the promise to update. I’m thinking that once classes actually start, I will probably only post once a week. None of this three posts a week nonesense. That simply won’t do when I have things going on other grocery shopping and a million emails for MuKappa.

I’m leaving tomorrow for Portland/Vancouver. I”m excited, but also really nervous. Would you mind praying? I’m nervous for lots of reasons. A. I’m always a bit nervous about new modes of transportation. I’m taking the bus to meet Twaan before we catch the train down. I’ll just feel better once I meet up with him downtown. B. I’m nervous to spend this much concentrated time with all of Twaan’s friends. Granted, I actually know two of them from Colorado–but those are actually the ones who make me most nervous. C. I’ve been doing much better lately at this whole relationship thing, but I still have moments where I freak out about commitment and long term things. I feel like this being the third trip to Portland/Vancouver says something about me being committed. Don’t get me wrong–I am. But things in the future still make me nervous. (Like: oh my gosh. I have to get a job and be responsible and be on my own this time next year. hello? this realization=terrifying)

so if you’ll pray that God would just give me peace and encouragement for all these things, that would be great. We’ve been doing pretty good, me and God. I’m more trusting lately, and I don’t freak as much. But still. I have moments. (I guess we all do, though)