Woohoo!

I got offered an internship today! It’s so exciting, it’s with a missions group that I think I would really love to work with. The position is really open as they’ve never had an intern before. It would be very fluid, and I could try a lot of things, but eventually hone in on anywhere they need help that really interests me.

I think this could be a great opportunity for me. The woman I’d be working with, Kathie, seems incredibly flexible which is so helpful for my dysfunctional summer schedule. The biggest struggle right now is whether or not I want to leave Colorado. So much of me has been planning to go back, have a break and rest from my time at school. I’ve been looking forward to that time with my parents, our community and a certain family that has become very dear to my heart in the past months. I would love this position, and I think I would love the people I would get to work with. But at the same time, I would love to go home, I would love to be mentored by Ghena, and I would love the comfort of some familiarity.

But whateer is in God’s will for me, that’s what I want to do. If you’ll keep me in your prayers as I try to make this decision, I would so so appreciate it. It’s difficult to have to choose between two great opportunities. But I’m so thankful and excited to have been offered this internship!

 

I know, I broke a promise…

…I didn’t write a long list about what I learned last quarter. Instead, my spring break was spent eating delicious food, hanging with friends, sitting for about 6 hours in a window seat staring at the sun, baking (in a kitchen with no one hovering), and sorting through old baby clothes. It was reflective, relaxing and beautiful.

One thing I did explore over Spring Break was my heart towards some difficult people that God has placed in my life. I’m ashamed to admit that I am not hte most forgiving person. I think if I had space and distance, that would make it easier to let go and move on. Unfortunately, at college, there’s no such things as space. Everyone seems to be walking in and out of my life each day with no reprieve. I’m learning what it means to love generously even when it takes up my precious time and how to let go of things that have hurt me (and love that person tangibly in the middle of that process). It isn’t easy.

I joined a “community group” at our church recently. On Monday night I talked to the leader for a long time and he said some things that I needed to hear. I almost started crying, and I’ve known the man barely over a week! It was amazing the amount that God said to me through him, and he didn’t even realize it.

This quarter, I’m also applying for jobs. I have to figure out my life now, which is both exciting and daunting. Right now I’m hoping to return to Colorado. I realized over Spring Break how much I miss it. I never have thought of anywhere as “home” until two weeks ago when I stepped off the plane and marched cheerfully to the train. I giggled at the sunshine pouring in the huge windows of DIA, and I think I clapped my hands in the car for joy over the wide open spaces. But at the same time, I am being open to where else God might take me. I’m looking forward to eagerly finding out whatever plan he has–Idaho, Colorado, Oregon–wherever and whatever! Maybe it’s the sunshine and the flowers in bloom and the trees blossoming: I have rarely felt more optimistic in my life.

 

I am sitting in the library (again)

I should be working on a paper. I have about 1 page of 4. It’s on the gift of Tongues. I’m writing about Acts vs 1 Corinthians. It’s been an interesting week of intense research, I have never read so many commentaries on Acts or 1 Corinthians 14. Calvin, Barnes, ICC, New Bible Commentary, and then there’s all the ish by Pentecostals and Cessasionists. I have six books in front of me, and notes from three more on my lap top that I am using. I have two footnotes and a title page.

I also need to go, now. But I dont want to. There is so, so much to do right now. So much has to get done before next week. You could pray about htat for me. I would appreciate it. There simply isn’t enough time in the world, and I feel so incredibly unmotivated. I just want to sip lattes, make chai, be friends with people, and ignore time.

Spring break is so soon, though. So soon. I am quite literally living on the strength of Jesus. Someday I will make a list of all the things I’ve learned this quarter. It’ll be a doo-zy.

oh shoot. crap. my paper is supposed to be double spaced. which means, I have 2 of 4 pages done. I haven’t even started 1 Corinthians. this is bad. there is not going to be enough space for everything.

 

Well well

It’s one of those days. Yeah for up and down emotions.

The good news is, according to Dr. Downing, we aren’t going to have another Great Depression. That was deflation. What we may (and probably will) experience will be inflation. Something more akin to the 1970’s.

 

You Know? I kind of like the exercise-ball-as-chair-phenomenon

It’s true. It’s starting to grow on me. Not to mention all these nifty exercises that Kelsie taught me. Which is handy, because my normal situps just weren’t hurting enough recently. But these moves on the exercise ball, well, they really help me satiate my masochistic tendencies. Ha.

Anyway. Nothing to say, I’m just really trying to make good on the promise to update. I’m thinking that once classes actually start, I will probably only post once a week. None of this three posts a week nonesense. That simply won’t do when I have things going on other grocery shopping and a million emails for MuKappa.

I’m leaving tomorrow for Portland/Vancouver. I”m excited, but also really nervous. Would you mind praying? I’m nervous for lots of reasons. A. I’m always a bit nervous about new modes of transportation. I’m taking the bus to meet Twaan before we catch the train down. I’ll just feel better once I meet up with him downtown. B. I’m nervous to spend this much concentrated time with all of Twaan’s friends. Granted, I actually know two of them from Colorado–but those are actually the ones who make me most nervous. C. I’ve been doing much better lately at this whole relationship thing, but I still have moments where I freak out about commitment and long term things. I feel like this being the third trip to Portland/Vancouver says something about me being committed. Don’t get me wrong–I am. But things in the future still make me nervous. (Like: oh my gosh. I have to get a job and be responsible and be on my own this time next year. hello? this realization=terrifying)

so if you’ll pray that God would just give me peace and encouragement for all these things, that would be great. We’ve been doing pretty good, me and God. I’m more trusting lately, and I don’t freak as much. But still. I have moments. (I guess we all do, though)

 

Portland… Vancouver… that place on the border

Look, updating! I’m trying to make good on that promise!

Next week Twaan and I are going to Portland/Vancouver. We have friends that live down there. Jared and Teresa, who we’ll probably be staying with. And Caleb and Kat who we might help move depending on when exactly we do go down.

Vancouver/Portland is home to a lot of the missionaries from Indonesia. From Jared and Caleb as MK’s, to the Pust family, it’s like going down to see Twaan’s extended family. It’s feels even more so that way since the adults get called Aunt and Uncle. In Indonesia, it’s a sign of respect, and the missionaries adopted it.

I think we are (hopefully) going to hike Multnomah Falls. I’m looking forward to it. I saw it when we drove past in June on our way to Idaho. Even such a short glimpse was enough to make an impression, I love waterfalls, and these looked really pretty. It’s only a 1.2 mile hike, but we can go the extra 6 to the top of the “mountain.” We’ll see. I haven’t run since I’ve been back to Seattle, so I’m not sure how I’ll be feeling about 7.2 miles. (And now that I think of it, that might be one way too…)

Today is nothing exciting. If you are out there and you read this, please pray for me. There are three of us living in the apartment now, and it’s hard to not have someone feeling left out. Usually, it ends up being me. It’s actually quite exasperating, because these are two of my really good friends. But we just don’t always do very well as a threesome. Drives me nuts when I want this to work so well.

blessings.

oh! PS! I wrote a whole two paragraphs today! WOOHOO. I hadn’t written anything since June before today.

 

Oh My.

I haven’t updated in quite a while. Not since January. and it’s September. I’m about to embark on a whole new school year. I’ve completely forgotten about this blog. I don’t know that anyone even reads it anymore.

Hm. I think, maybe this year, I will try to be a better updater. Here are some basic things going on right now though.

Classes start on the 29th of this month. That’s really far away, and yet right around the corner. I’ve been back in Seattle moving in to the apartment for about a week. I still have a couple more boxes to get from random people, and my couch as well, but I have mostly moved in just about everything I own in the SEattle area. It’s been interesting. Kelsie was already here, and I feel like I have moved in to someone else’s home in someways. Anna comes tonight, and Caitlin just before school starts again. I’m sure it will feel the same for them. But One can never say exactly what anyone else is feeling. (Half the time I don’t know what I’m feeling.)

I’m president MuKappa this year–it’s the club on campus for MK’s (missionary kids). I’m excited for it. It’s going to be a great ministry. The club is going to meet at our apartment each Sunday night for dinner and hang out. I’m so excited to get to know the girls (and guys too). We’re having a girl’s small group made up of MuKappa people also, and I think that will be fantastic.

Twaan and I are still dating. Which is amazing after the hellacious year and summer that I’ve been through. I feel like some of the original passion has died down, but I also think that’s normal. I appreciate our relationship in quieter (but no less important) ways now. I appreciate having someone to just be with, and not have to always be doing something, or feel the need for activity. Last night we finished a movie, walked back to my apartment where he collapsed on my couch while I had tea and sat beside him. And it was probably one of the nicest nights since I’ve been back.

Other than that, life goes on, much as it always has. I’m tired today, because I walked up to Safeway and walked down with a whole bunch of groceries (if you live in Seattle or know Queen Anne you can understand that it is a bit of a hike to the grocery from Nickerson Street). Tonight I am going to make sloppy joes, see a friend, welcome Anna home, and just hang out. Very cowish (to those who understand that). Very lovely.

love and blessings

 

Hi Again

He told me what it was.

I mean, it was lots of things. It was a whole bunch of stuff that I was holding onto.

But the future one was definitely it. Just, not exactly. God does want me to let go of my future plans, and let him handle it all. But those plans are far distant from the onese I was really holding onto with tigthly clenched fists. Nope. He had things a bit sooner in mind.

Like apply to be the SPU equivalent of an RA next year.

Which is a quarter long process. So if you don’t mind praying, that would be nice.

ciao mis hermanos. Ustedes son en los manos de Dios.

sara beth.

 

Pues

I haven’t updated in… let’s see… months? creo que si.

I am back in Colorado now, for Christmas break. It is basically wonderful thus far. I have a friend, Sarah Barton who came with me for a few days. She leaves tonight, so this will be short as I want to spend all the time I can with her.

 Fall Quarter was good. It was long and tiring and exhausting, but I learned a lot. God was so good to me, in so many ways that I did not deserve. I mean, we never deserved anything from him, but this quarter, he just showed continual grace and love to me, in ways I cannot even describe. I ran the whole quarter on his strength, and his endurance.

I made some pretty awesome new friends. MuKappa (a cadre for mk’s) had a bunch of new people this year, and that was good. It was also wonderful to reconnect with the old ones, and get to know some of them better. For instance, Daniel, who had a girlfriend last year, I hardly knew. Well, I knew him, but I knew him in the context of Anna Marie. Now that they aren’t together it has been interesting to get to know them separately, as individuals. One of the newbies: Anna, is from Spain and she is basically wonderful and sarcastic and funny and we get along super well.

Also, I have just learned so  much academically. I got the opportunity to do a big research project on Chechnya/Ingushetyia/Dagestan, and it was amazing. My prof was incredibly helpful, and I cannot have imagined doing the project without his help and encouragement to delve into a subject htat I wanted, rather than my second choice.

And yep. Life was tiring and emotional, but it was good.

selamet,

sara

postscript: I might have forgotten to mention that I am dating someone. so that is good too.

 

wow.

I just finished 24 pages on an allegory I just started about…two weeks ago. (okay, maybe it’s three, I can’ recall)

what’s surprising isn’t hte number. I mean, I’ve written more than just those 24 pages on this allegory. and I’ve been working on other things as well. so it isn’t the number at all. but it is the number, because I was just jotting down some thoughts, thinking that it would be anice easy peice to work on later, maybe during the school year or next summer even. and then I just couldn’t stop. 24 pages! when I thought I was just jotting down thoughts.

shabat shalom